Learning to love bad runs

21/07/15  5km spot on

Last night was toughhhh.  I don’t know if it was the heat (its been in the 30s all week) or because I’ve not eaten much the last few days (because of the heat) or because it was a new area, or because of any impending girlie reasons (ahem) but it was a battle start to finish, mostly me just wanting to cry.  I managed 5km. 

At the end I sat in the park (watching all the other ‘better than me’ runners), and thought a lot about what just happened.  I realised I have got to learn to love ‘bad runs’. I mean not every run is going to be good is it?

I think what upsets me the most is that this year, I have tried to get back into running, but every bad run has knocked my confidence, and made it much harder to get back out there, I started back in Jan, I’d do a couple of goodun’s then a bad one and then a month would go by before I try again, and every time the month off would have me starting back at point one, frustratingly.  But every time I’d wish I’d just got back out there and done it, and not given up.  If I had kept going from January, I’d be running marathons by now I’m sure, and would be so much fitter and better which is the goal.

As I sat and pondered my run I also had another revelation, that actually it wasn’t a bad run, my legs didn’t hurt like they normally do, my breathing wasn’t horrendous like it normally was, so Celeste what exactly was bad about it?  At which point I realised that it was all psychological!  It was lead legs all over again (I'll write about the lead legs saga another time). The only bad thing about it was my mental ability to believe that I could do it. Which means it was a good run physically.  Time to start building the mental muscle maybe.

The most important thing is now that I get back out there for run 3/3 (I’m aiming/committing to run 3 times a week, no argument, no fears).  Hopefully after the bad run comes a good one, and every run is building my ability and fitness and I just have to focus on that. I’m not where I was 3 weeks ago, I’m not where I was in January.  So bad runs are an awesome reminder of all that and a time to reflect.  I do love bad runs honestly!